Sonic Spindash Role-Playing
http://sonic.spindash.net/forums/

Frostbite the Caracal
http://sonic.spindash.net/forums/viewtopic.php?f=70&t=433
Page 1 of 1

Author:  FrostTheCaracal [ Sun Jul 08, 2012 3:56 am ]
Post subject:  Frostbite the Caracal

What is your character's name?

> Frostbite

Species?

> Caracal(An African wild cat species)

Age?

> 17

Give us a couple paragraphs of general info about your character. For example, what's the character's personality like? What kind of things does he or she do? Why does he or she do it? (Please don't give us your character's point-by-point life history, though.)

> Frostbite is persistent. He continues despite problems; tenaciously or obstinately continuing despite problems or difficulties that he often causes due to his sour attitude. He doesn't want to let his comrades down so he doesn't sulk about it; instead he works hard to fix it. He is devoted, He is very dedicated; feeling or showing great dedication to his tribe and comrades. He is prideful to a fault towards his tribe. He often doesn't show it but he feels the bond he has with his tribe and wants the best for it. He is very forgiving to others. He allowing room for error or weakness in others, as he knows they're not perfect. He knows they feel most vulnerable when they mess up and wouldn't want to drive the nail in deeper.

Frostbite is apathetic. He is indifferent and unenergetic: not taking any interest in anything, or not bothering to do anything. He rarely will actually do something that doesn't pertain to his needs. He is nearly anti-social and will more or less be grumpy and mutter to himself over more annoying his comrades are. He is selfish. He often shows that his personal needs and wishes are thought to be more important than those of other people. He does not give up to anything that belongs to him unless its to his family. He feels he is often more important than the trivial subject around him. He is aloof; is remote in manner: uninvolved or unwilling to become involved with other people or events. He does not cooperate well with anyone outside his bloodline and can be hostile towards them. He doesn't like to be ordered around like he's just a throw-away. He is a very jealous individual. is envious: feeling bitter and unhappy because of anothers advantages, possessions, or luck. He is jealous if one of friend's, a term he rarely uses over comrade, attention is taken from him and onto someone he does not like. He also is jealous of others that have more muscle and stronger than him; he wishes his was as strong as them so he could help more.

Frostbite is often portrayed as a collector. He is after certain items and won't hesitate to attack someone for something he wants. The items that attract him most are things bold in color, shiny, or loud items. He enjoys weather; his favorite being snow which he gets to see more often than when he was in Africa. For a cat, he does enjoy rain; he often takes off his bandages and prances out in the rain. He even likes wind and storms; it sets him on a delightful edge. The only kind of weather he isn't all that happy about is heat. He is neutral towards it but it does tend to make his fur sticky and he prefers cooler weather. His favorite time of day happens to be dusk. It has barely the hint of light with darkness creeping upon it.

Does your character have any skills or special abilities, a gimmick, or anything that makes it stand out as an athlete or fighter? If so, talk a little about it here. Be sure to include an explanation or origin story for anything unusual, extraordinary, or supernatural.

>Frostbite is most or less an close combat fighter. He isn't the most durable but his quick reflexes, agility, and good eye sight makes up for the lack of strength. When an enemy lands a hit on Frost in close combat; the adversary will feel a frosty chill through their body. It doesn't harm the opponent but it could cause a pause or shiver depending on their reaction. Now if the adversary lands three successful hits on Frostbite, the opponent will start to feel numbness within their limbs. This is Frostbite's defense system. Since he can't take many hits; the enemy will learn that landing a hit on him will start to effect them.

Now, if Frostbite lands a hit on the opponent; there isn't a frosty chill. The ability doesn't apply while he is on offense. Instead, while doing the attacking; he will use his sharp cat-like claws to leave scratches. It isn't very effective but it's more of Frostbite taunting his opponent than trying to do damage. For a last minute taunt; when his opponent is stunned from his frost chill, he uses a rope to hog tie them and simply leave them there. He doesn't believe killing is necessary and respects his opponent enough to leave them with only humiliation.

Frostbite doesn't always win his fights though. He usually loses when it comes to long range fighting as he has nothing to protect himself but his speed and reflexes. He can travel at 100 MPH; but can get up to 300 MPH when chaos is active.. When faced with long range opponents, he often has to dodge and scratch his adversary. It isn't the smartest tactic because he becomes tired. His stamina isn't a bad but it's not the best either. He can only doge for so long before he is defenseless. When he is desperate enough, he will look for openings and fight dirty.

The reason behind his frosty chill is because of the location he was born. It was very abnormal for it to snow in Africa. The night he was born, a few frosty flakes began to fall and one landed on his forehead. It wasn't directly stated within his tribe how he received his power but everyone told him that it happened soon after he was born. The frosty chill was never physically noticed until his mother picked him up in her arms; feeling a chill run up her spine. It was later noticed when he was about 5, that his chill causes numbness in the body.

Does your character have any purpose? (It's okay if you don't have this fully figured out yet, but all the better if your character does have an agenda or some sort of driving force to it to make it interact with other characters.)

>His purpose is pretty simple; he wants to collect feathers from every species of bird he can find. In his tribe, the more different feathers you have; the higher ranking you are. He will often ask people if they've seen any birds around lately and somehow drag them into helping him get his bird feathers.

Does your character have an image? You can post it here, if so (as long as you follow the rules mentioned in the character guidelines). If not, please write a description of your character's appearance.

>Frostbite appears as a Caracal, an species of African wildcat. He stands at 99 centimeters tall; weighing 35 kilograms. He is an average height and weigh yet with an lithe build. His fur is a frosty ice blue with darker and lighter flecks. His chest and belly fur is milky white. He has large, tufted black ears and a short black stubby tail. He is ears are lined with black on the outside. His pupils contract to form circles rather than the slits. His eye lids are rimmed with black fur. His pupils are a golden amber color, blazing with passion. He has black spots above his amber eyes and white spots around his nose. His legs are long; making him good at agility yet he doesn't have his muscles built making him have low stamina and weak at physical fighting. He has a few tuffs of spiky hair protruding from his forehead with purple beads woven in the fur. To top off his appearance, he has a tribal tattoo on his stomach; covered by bandages. The tattoo is of silt eye with various curls and loops extending from the eye.

For clothing, Frostbite is more simple in design; wearing only gloves, sandals, a belt, and bandages. His gloves are fingerless, having a lilac color with purple cuffs. They have a diamond shaped cut-out, revealing pale frosty blue fur poking out. He wears clean, white bandages around his midriff and down to his hips. He also has bandages on his knees and ankles; used much as an alternative for socks. His sandals are hand woven, dyed black. He wears a hand woven, black dyed belt around his bandage covered hips. There are small purple beads woven into the belt and often rope is hanging from the belt.

Image
Also, I did use a reference picture. I looked at a screen shot from Sonic X for the pose but I did not trace. This was freehanded.


Will you be around to play your character regularly? (i.e. Keeping daily tabs on any threads you involve yourself in, and posting whenever it's your turn?)

>I use the computer everyday and anywhere from 8-16 hours. The only time I will not log on is late mornings(9-11 AM).

Do you live in or near the Americas, or elsewhere? (It may be difficult for you to participate in any of the fast-moving sessions if you're only online when the rest of the group is asleep, so we ask this just to be aware of any potential problems.)

>Yeah, I live in America. UTC-06:00 Central Time.

Are you okay with having your character information and image on this website (such as on the wiki)?

>Yes, I'm perfectly fine with this.

What is your name? (This question isn't optional. We need something to call you by that isn't your character's name. Don't post your last name, though! This forum isn't private.)

>Zeke, if you must know.

Author:  Admin [ Sun Jul 08, 2012 4:56 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Frostbite the Caracal

Hi. Thanks for submitting, but, this probably isn't going to work. In shortest possible form, here's the straight dope on the problems:

- The personality info contradicts itself.
- The origin-story for his power is a kind of silly-sounding unexplained magic that seems outside the series' styling (barring Sonic's dream-adventures in magical lands like Secret Rings and Black Knight, which aren't counted here).
- To doubly reiterate for clarity, his power just plain does not make sense (magical African snowflake, enough said), and expressly forces its effects on others, thus causing you to violate the consent rule before you've even written your first post in the RP.
- This is the Sonic-world version of Earth. There is no Africa (though there is an equivalent named Mazuri).
- We just accepted a character named "Frost." This one's name is too close to that.
- Despite being long, it doesn't seem like you spent much effort writing your profile, judging by its inconsistencies and many grammar-related problems.

Want the specifics? Expand below for some quotes.

Quote:
Frostbite is persistent. He continues despite problems; tenaciously or obstinately continuing despite problems or difficulties that he often causes due to his sour attitude. He doesn't want to let his comrades down so he doesn't sulk about it; instead he works hard to fix it. He is devoted, He is very dedicated; feeling or showing great dedication to his tribe and comrades.

Versus...

Quote:
Frostbite is apathetic. He is indifferent and unenergetic: not taking any interest in anything, or not bothering to do anything.

Wait, what? You just got through saying that he was some sort of persistent, tenacious, stubbornly-driven problem-solver who is devoted and dedicated to his brethren, then you turn right around and say he is apathetic and indifferent?

Quote:
He feels he is often more important than the trivial subject around him. He is aloof; is remote in manner: uninvolved or unwilling to become involved with other people or events.

Random punctuation is strong in this one. You should probably avoid including punctuation you aren't certain how to use correctly, such as semicolons and colons.

Quote:
When an enemy lands a hit on Frost in close combat; the adversary will feel a frosty chill through their body. It doesn't harm the opponent but it could cause a pause or shiver depending on their reaction. Now if the adversary lands three successful hits on Frostbite, the opponent will start to feel numbness within their limbs.

No, you don't get to have automatic-effect powers on other player characters just because they're beating yours. That's just lame, and furthermore, it sounds like some sort of MMORPG passive defensive power, and not like something belonging in a scifi-based Sonic RP.

Quote:
For a last minute taunt; when his opponent is stunned from his frost chill, he uses a rope to hog tie them and simply leave them there.

I don't mean to be rude, but this is not an acceptable or fair approach to RP, and rings of what kids back in the day used to call "lamer" or "godmode" behavior.

Quote:
He can travel at 100 MPH; but can get up to 300 MPH when chaos is active.

No, there are rules in our RP on what kinds of characters can reach speeds such as that. This isn't one of them.

Quote:
The reason behind his frosty chill is because of the location he was born. It was very abnormal for it to snow in Africa. The night he was born, a few frosty flakes began to fall and one landed on his forehead. It wasn't directly stated within his tribe how he received his power but everyone told him that it happened soon after he was born. The frosty chill was never physically noticed until his mother picked him up in her arms; feeling a chill run up her spine. It was later noticed when he was about 5, that his chill causes numbness in the body.

In other words, your explanation for his power is a magical African snowflake. This should really speak for itself.

Quote:
Also, I did use a reference picture. I looked at a screen shot from Sonic X for the pose but I did not trace. This was freehanded.

We would normally say that any kind of copying is unacceptable, but frankly, I wouldn't have been able to tell if you hadn't told me first, as it bears little similarity, so I'm not terribly concerned. The fact that you were honest and forthcoming about it is appreciated.




I don't mean for the above to sound as incendiary as it may have, but it's just that this is not the kind of thing we do around here. One should consider quality over quantity, also. You wrote a lot, but it was laden with typos, random punctuation, and redundancy. Furthermore, the fact that every sentence started with "He" or the character's name made it mind-numbing to read and review.



Again, thanks for taking the time to apply and all, but, this may not be the RP for you.This character does seem right up Sonic Cyclone's alley, though. Maybe you should take a peek over there.

Author:  FrostTheCaracal [ Sun Jul 08, 2012 8:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Frostbite the Caracal

I want in this site, I'm not settling for Sonic Cyclone. I do not like it there. They're not literate enough for me and they all are running around with swords and outfits that look like they came out of Call of Duty.

I'll be honest with you. I slapped on a personality from another one of my characters that shares the same design and name but different fandom. All I did was change the wording to fit my needs though I probably didn't do a good job with all the 'he's.

To clear things up on his personality, I meant he doesn't do things for people outside himself and his tribe.

Actually it wasn't possible to be magic but I couldn't figure out out how it any thing could come in to play like how Blaze got her fire. I haven't read any of the sonic comics, TV show, and I've only played the 1998 and 2001 Sonic games for the Sega Dreamcast so I don't even know what kind of things can happen now days.

Okay

I can't really do anything about the name. Originally it was Frost when I made my account but I noticed there already was a Frost so I changed it to Frostbite but I can't change it again. His name has to have Frost in it to fit with his powers, fur color, and cold personality.

Uh, I can rewrite his powers and how he gets them I guess... though I have no idea what to do. I haven't played the games since everyone still owned a Dreamcast...and before you say go to the Wiki page for Powers and look. I did already, nothing helped.

I dunno, I spent a couple hours on the profile but I probably spent longer drawing then thinking about my character.

I tend to over punctuate but I am a literate roleplayer. I don't have many spelling mistakes at least. I can try to go easy on the punctuation but that's just something you'll have to get used to because I am going to get in here whether you like it or not.

Author:  psikeout [ Sun Jul 08, 2012 9:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Frostbite the Caracal

Y'know, I was with you there for a few. I was thinking, "Maybe this guy's on the level; maybe we got off on the wrong foot here." Then I read the last sentence of your post.

FrostTheCaracal wrote:
I can try to go easy on the punctuation but that's just something you'll have to get used to because I am going to get in here whether you like it or not.

FrostTheCaracal wrote:
I am going to get in here whether you like it or not.

FrostTheCaracal wrote:
whether you like it or not.


Image

Page 1 of 1 All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/